Lecture
The family is a historically changing social group, the universal signs of which are heterosexual intercourse, the system of kinship relations and the development of social and individual personal qualities and the implementation of certain economic activities [18].
A social institution is understood as an organized system of relations and social norms that combine meaningful social values of a procedure that satisfies the basic needs of society. In this definition, social values are shared ideas and goals, public procedures are standardized patterns of behavior in group processes, and a system of social connections is the interweaving of roles and statuses through which this behavior is carried out and maintained within certain limits [6].
The institution of the family includes the totality of social values (love, attitude towards children, family life), social procedures (care for the upbringing of children, their physical development, family rules and obligations); the interweaving of roles and statuses (the status and roles of a husband, wife, child, teenager, mother-in-law, mother-in-law, brothers, etc.), with the help of which family life is realized. Thus, an institution is a peculiar form of human activity based on a clearly developed ideology; system of rules and regulations, as well as developed social control over their implementation. Institutions support social structures and order in society.
The separation of the family institution from other institutions of society (the state, business, education, religion, etc.) is not accidental. It is the family that is recognized by all researchers as the main carrier of cultural patterns inherited from generation to generation, as well as a necessary condition for the socialization of the individual. It is in a family that a person learns social roles and obtains the basics of education and upbringing.
The most complete function of the family as a social institution is identified by a sociologist: the function of sexual regulation, reproductive function, socialization function, emotional satisfaction, status function, protective function, economic function [13].
Of the factors of socialization, the most important and influential was and remains the parental family as the primary unit of society, the influence of which the child experiences first and foremost when he is most susceptible. Family conditions, including social status, occupation, material level and level of education of parents, largely determine the life path of the child. In addition to the conscious, purposeful upbringing that parents give him, the child is affected by the whole family atmosphere, and the effect of this influence accumulates with age, refracted in the personality structure.
There is practically no social or psychological aspect of the behavior of adolescents and young men who do not depend on their family conditions in the present or the past. True, the nature of this dependence is changing. So, if in the past the child's school performance and the duration of his education depended mainly on the material level of the family, now this factor is less influential. According to the data of the Leningrad sociologist E. K. Vasilyeva (1975), for parents with higher education, the proportion of children with high academic performance (average score above 4) is three times higher than in the group of families with parent education below seven classes. This dependence persists even in the upper grades, when children have the skills of independent work and do not need the direct help of parents [2].
A significant influence on the personality of a teenager is exerted by the style of his relationship with his parents, which is only partly due to their social status.
Family socialization is not limited to the direct “paired” interaction of the child with his parents. No less important is the mechanism of psychological counteraction: a young man, whose freedom is severely restricted, can develop a heightened desire for independence, and the one to whom everyone is allowed to grow dependent. Therefore, the specific characteristics of the child’s personality are, in principle, impossible to derive from the properties of his parents (neither by similarity, nor by contrast), nor by individual methods of education.
At the same time, the emotional tone of family relationships and the type of control and discipline prevailing in the family are very important. Psychologists present the emotional tone of relations between parents and children in the form of a scale, on one pole of which there are maximally close, warm, benevolent relations (parental love), and on the other - distant, cold and hostile. In the first case, the main means of education are attention and encouragement, in the second - severity and punishment. Many studies prove the advantages of the first approach. The emotional tone of family education does not exist by itself, but in connection with a certain type of control and discipline aimed at shaping the corresponding traits of character. Different methods of parental control can also be represented as a scale, at one pole of which is high activity, independence and initiative of the child, and on the other - passivity, dependence, blind obedience
Behind these types of relationships is not only the distribution of power, but also a different direction of intra-family communication: in some cases, communication is directed primarily or exclusively from parents to child, in others - from child to parents.
In our country there are different styles of family education, which largely depend on both national traditions and individual characteristics. However, in general, our treatment of children is much more authoritarian and harsh than we are inclined to admit.
No matter how great the influence of parents on the formation of personality, it peaks not in transitional age, but in the first years of life. For senior classes, the style of relationships with parents has long been established, and it is impossible to “undo” the effect of past experience.
The basis of the child's emotional attachment to parents is initially dependence on them. As self-reliance grows, especially at a transitional age, such an addiction begins a child to become indigent. It is very bad when he lacks parental love. But there is quite reliable psychological evidence that an excess of emotional heat is also harmful for both boys and girls. It complicates the formation of their internal anatomy and creates a steady need for care, dependence as a character trait. Too cozy parent nest does not stimulate the grown chick to fly into the controversial and complex adult world.
Arguing abstractly, good parents know much more about their child than anyone else, even more than themselves. After all, parents are watching every day throughout his life. But changes that occur with a teenager are often made too quickly for the parent's eye. The child has grown, changed, and loving parents still see him as he had a ball a few years ago, and his own opinion seems to him to be infallible. “The main trouble with the parents is that they knew us when we were small,” said a 15-year-old boy. The first task of parents is to find a common solution, to convince each other. If you have to compromise, it is imperative that the basic requirements of the parties are met. When one parent makes a decision, he must remember the position of the second. The second task is to make the child not see contradictions in the positions of the parents, i.e. It’s better to discuss these issues without him.
Parents, making a decision, should not put their own views first, but what will be more useful for the child.
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Pedagogy and didactics
Terms: Pedagogy and didactics