Ethnic Relationship

The importance of views is universal, but usually we are not sure how we look and how we look. In our culture, honesty requires that we look directly into the eyes. In other cultures, other rules, as the director of a New York City high school recently discovered.
A young high school girl, a fifteen-year-old Puerto-Rican, was caught in a closet with a group of girls suspected of smoking. Most of the group consisted of well-known troublemakers, and although this girl, Libya, had no remarks, after a short conversation the director came to conviction of her guilt and decided to temporarily exclude with others.
It was not what she described, he said later. - She just reacted to this. It was something tricky and suspicious. She did not even meet with my eyes, did not look at me.
So it was. Talking to the director, Livia stared at the floor, which seemed like an obvious admission of guilt, and refused to look into his eyes.
But she's a good girl, ”Livia’s mother insisted. This was not happening at school, according to the director, she was too much a "troublemaker" to come to the leadership with her protest. Instead, she turned to her neighbors and friends. As a result, the parents of the Puerto Rican children staged a demonstration the next morning, and the unrest threatened to escalate into riot.
Fortunately, John Flores taught Spanish literature at this school, and John lived behind several doors from Libya and her family. Taking courage, John asked the director for a meeting.
“I know Libya and her parents,” he told the director. - She is a good girl. I'm sure there is some kind of mistake in all this.
“If there is any mistake,” said the director anxiously, “I will be glad to correct it.” Behind the door, thirty mothers are eager for my blood, but I myself have questioned this child, and if I have ever seen wine written on my face, then this is exactly the case - she could not even meet my gaze!
John sighed with relief and with great caution, since he himself was a newcomer to this school and “walked on tiptoe” himself, explained to the principal some highlights of Puerto Rican culture.
In Puerto Rico, a good girl, he explained, never meets her eyes with adults. She thereby shows respect and obedience. It was just as difficult for Livia to look into your eyes, how to behave badly or how her mother would come to you with a complaint. In our culture for such a respected family, such behavior is unacceptable.
Fortunately, the director was a man who could admit he was wrong. He invited Libya, her parents and many noisy neighbors to enter and again discussed the problem. In the light of the explanations of John Flores, it became clear that Livia avoids looking into his eyes, not because of disobedience, but because of innate modesty; it was not stealth, but timidity. And during this meeting, when the parents relaxed, he realized that Livia is really a gentle and soft girl.
The result of the entire incident was the establishment of a deeper and more meaningful relationship between the school and the commune - but that's another story. Here the erroneous opinion that arose from the director is especially interesting. How could he so clearly misinterpret all the signals of Libya's behavior?
Livia said in body language: “I am a good girl, I respect you and school. I respect you too much to answer your questions, respect you too much to meet your eyes with shameless courage, respect you too much to protect yourself. But, of course, my very attitude will tell you about it ",
And how could this clear message be translated like this: “I do not obey you. I will not answer your questions. I will not look you in the eye, since I am a lying child. I will cunningly leave your questions "?
Of course, it's all about the difference of cultures. Different cultures have different customs and, of course, different body language. The same views may have different meanings, and the views themselves differ.